So, Why Does AOL Suck?

Well, if you're going to name your channel #aol-sucks, I guess you expect this, but people pop in and ask this question all the damn time. Sometimes, we just lose it...


Gena (~gena@gboro51.spyder.net) has joined channel #aol-sucks
Gena is Joining #aol-sucks
<DestinEE> Ohmigod.
<DestinEE> It can't be.
<DestinEE> Gena Smith!?
<geck-o> Gena Davis?
<DestinEE> Geena Lollabrigidda?
<Gwnzrf> Gena Shock?
<Gena> So, why does AOL suck?
<DestinEE> AOL sucks because of censorship, underfeatured software, pay-as-you-g o access and commercial content.
<kail> AOL sucks because it's unreliable, expensive, and has a big brother mentality
<DestinEE> Besides, an AOLer ripped me off for five bucks once.
<Gwnzrf> An AOLer KILLED MY DOG
<geck-o> AOL RIPPED MY FLESH... BZZZZZ.
<DestinEE> AOL murdered my half step-brother.
<RichNJ> AOL keyed my car.
<kail> AOL ate my baby
<geck-o> AOL farted in my general direction.
<Gwnzrf> AOL CHEATS AT MONOPOLY!
<DestinEE> AOL is transmitting radio messages on ultra-high frequencies saying "Kill the state."
<kail> AOL waved their private parts at my aunties
<DestinEE> AOL vomited on my shoes at a party o nce.
<geck-o> AOL was kidnapped by aliens and given intense rectal examinations.
<DestinEE> AOL blocks the reception on my black and white TV on Tuesdays.
<kail> AOL took over a small island country and made the inhabitants drink Mr. PIB
<RichNJ> AOL cut my clotheslines down
<DestinEE> AOL is making the gaslights in my house flicker.
<RichNJ> AOL ripped the Christmas lights off my shrubs
<DestinEE> AOL cuts across my yard on the way home from school.
<geck-o> AOL is responsible for my utter failure as a human being.
<DestinEE> AOL stole my girlfriend.
<Gwnzrf> AOL cut my income by one-third
<DestinEE> AOL narced on me to the IRS.
<geck-o> AOL lowered my property values.
<DestinEE> AOL switched my coffee to Sanka.
<Gwnzrf> AOL MADE MY URINE TURN BLUE
<geck-o> AOL sold me bad acid.
<Joe-> AOL is responsible for the increase in std's across the nation.
<RichNJ> AOL ate my sandwich
<Gena> I think it may have been AOL that, well that took my virginity!
<Gwnzrf> AOL owes me lunch
<DestinEE> AOL put Ti-D-bowl in the toilets at work. Except it wasn't Ti-D-bowl....
<DestinEE> AOL hit me first.
<geck-o> AOL never tips.
<Gwnzrf> AOL KILLED JFK
<DestinEE> AOL smells funny.
<RichNJ> AOL let the air out of my tires
<DestinEE> AOL erased the Watergate tapes.
<Gwnzrf> AOL smells like a burrito
<DestinEE> AOL's mother smells funny.
<Joe-> AOL is responsible for all the battered women
<geck-o> AOL lies to get additional frequent flyer miles.
<Gwnzrf> AOL hogs the bathroom and never puts its hands in its pocket
<DestinEE> AOL thinks the national debt is funny.
kail has left channel #aol-sucks
<geck-o> AOL made kail leave the channel.
<DestinEE> AOL stole Newt Gingrich's peanuts.
<kail> AOL is responisble for the death of democracy
* Joe- a lot of women get battered while AOL is adding art.......
<RichNJ> AOL shit in my toilet and didn't flush
<DestinEE> AOL made the Niners lose.
<kail> AOL left the seat up
<geck-o> AOL has poor grooming habits.
Signoff: runamok ()
<Gwnzrf> AOL frightened runamok
<DestinEE> AOL hogs more than half the covers.
<Joe-> AOL injured William Floyd
<geck-o> AOL made this an eerily fascinating activity.
<DestinEE> AOL slams their doors at night.
<RichNJ> AOL ripped off my Pink Floyd CD
<Gwnzrf> AOL pulls tags off of matresses
<geck-o> AOL howls too loudly when it's in heat.
<kail> AOL left the stove on
<Gena> Um, will you guys be doing this all night?
<DestinEE> AOL borrowed my records, and then didn't bring them back.
<RichNJ> AOL calls my house and hangs up.
<Joe-> AOL is the dirty rat that killed my brother
<DestinEE> AOL makes us do this lal night.
<geck-o> Gena: YOU STARTED THIS YOU FOOL.
<Gwnzrf> AOL is responsible for disco fever
<Joe-> AOL left the cap off the tooth paste
<Gena> Oh, hell, did I start it?
<Joe-> AOL is responsible for the death of disco
<Gwnzrf> AOL tips poorly
<geck-o> tj: did that.
<DestinEE> AOL got me started on asci art.
<geck-o> Gena: you asked why AOL sucks when it's clearly explained in the topic.
<Gwnzrf> AOL made me repeat a joke
<Gena> Right, silly me.
<geck-o> AOL made Gena repent.
<Gwnzrf> AOL doesn't read the topic
<kail> AOL made me repeat second grage
<RichNJ> AOL dulled my hockey skates.
<kail> grade
<DestinEE> AOL drives over 55.
<geck-o> AOL drives under 55.
<DestinEE> AOL killed grunge.
<Gwnzrf> AOL killed Elvis
* kail is kidding, she didn't repeat second grade
<RichNJ> AOL made me fall through the ice when I was 9
<Gwnzrf> AOL better get me a bucket, cuz I think I'm gonna throw up
<geck-o> AOL cums in buckets.
<Gwnzrf> AOL delayed Finley'
<DestinEE> AOL snores.
<Gwnzrf> AOL delayed Finley's puberty
<DestinEE> AOL breaths through their mouth.
<geck-o> AOL doesn't use deoderant.
<RichNJ> AOL always calls me up and says "What's up?"
<Joe-> AOL made Egelhof love Macintosh
<Gwnzrf> AOL prefers Brand X to Pepsi
<Joe-> AOL made Finley buy Macintosh
<Joe-> AOL is not the choice of the next generation
<Gwnzrf> AOL made Steve Jobs grow a beard
<geck-o> AOL really ties one on, calls at four in the morning and yells, "I LOVE YOU MAN, YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND!"
<RichNJ> AOL made me buy Win95
<DestinEE> AOL laughed when Bambi's mother died.
<Gwnzrf> AOL killed Bambi's mother
clyons (~clyons@phish.nether.net) has joined channel #aol-sucks
Clyons is Joining #aol-sucks
<Joe-> AOL made Bill Gates the richest man in the nation
<RichNJ> AOL made me join the Marines.
<clyons> I don't need to know why AOL sucks.
<Gwnzrf> AOL laughs at parts in movies that are sad, no funny
<DestinEE> AOL steered the Hindenburg.
<Joe-> AOL made Steve Ballmer hyper active
<clyons> I know why it sucks.
<geck-o> Too late.
<Gena> Ok, I think I understand. I don't need any more reasons. Thank you.
<clyons> AOL has my GRANDMOTHER on it!
<RichNJ> AOL designed the Challenger's O-rings
<geck-o> AOL gives my iguana hemorrhoids.
<Joe-> AOL is the grinch that stole christmas
<Gwnzrf> AOL has plausible deniability
<DestinEE> AOL makes my throat swolen and scratchy.
<Malice> AOL is a black hole.
<Gwnzrf> AOL is the missing link to GOATS
<RichNJ> AOL moves "Mad about You" to Sunday
<Gwnzrf> AOL has three nipples
<geck-o> AOL puts reruns on E.R.
<DestinEE> AOL consumes all wavelenghts of light.
<Gwnzrf> AOL made "Friends" less funny
<Gena> AOL has fallen and can't get up
<Joe-> AOL is having chest pains
<Gwnzrf> AOL told Jonathan Richman to go acoustic
<RichNJ> AOL got rid of "Marcelle" on Friends
<DestinEE> AOL killed Dino.
<Joe-> AOL smokes cigerettes while it is pregnant with gnn
<geck-o> AOL wonders if the woman at the end of 12 Monkeys was from the present or the past.
<DestinEE> AOL killed John Holmes.
<Gwnzrf> AOL broke Jackie Gleason's leg on national TV
<DestinEE> AOL erased key lines in the original screenplay of Twelve Monkeys, confusing geek-o.
<geck-o> I'm not confused, dammit.
<Gwnzrf> AOL writes posts to rec.movies.current-films about 12 Monkeys
<Gwnzrf> AOL confused gecko
<Gwnzrf> AOL drinks all the beer
<Malice> AOL spams to more then just rec.movies.current-films about 12 Monkeys.
<DestinEE> AOL advertises web pages that have way too many graphics.
<Gwnzrf> AOL woke up a sleeping old-dog
<RichNJ> AOL calls channels "rooms"
<geck-o> AOL is loading new art.
<Gwnzrf> AOL has three letters and none of them rhyme
<Joe-> AOL is responsible for the rise of Nazi Germany
* kail is getting nausous
<Huber> AOL cums in buckets.
<RichNJ> AOL stole my girlfriend :(
<Gwnzrf> AOL came on Huber
<Joe-> AOL is Nazi Gemrany
<Malice> AOL would still have constipation even if it got it's head out of it's ass.
<DestinEE> AOL calls your web site "*MY HOME PAGE*"
<kail> huber: that's AOLbot, silly
<Gwnzrf> AOL promises it wouldn't cum in my mouth
<Gena> AOL made me quit smoking last week, and I am NOT happy, yet...
<geck-o> AOL uses teeth.
ClarkCu has left channel #aol-sucks
<Gwnzrf> AOL sucks because it uses teeth
<DestinEE> AOL went out with my best friend without telling me.
<Malice> AOL is the big fat cellmate named "Buba"
<RichNJ> AOL gave me a "C" in Spanish
<Gwnzrf> AOL made the Raiders lose 7 straight games
<geck-o> AOL sucks trainrek better than carlton.
<DestinEE> AOL smokes too much.
<Huber> AOL is squishy.
<Gena> Rich, you got a C?
<DestinEE> AOL created Visual Basic.
<Gwnzrf> AOL is mooshy
<Malice> AOL was in Seven: It was the guy who's sin was gluttony.
Huber is now known as AOL
<AOL> Quit talking about me.
<geck-o> AOL was in Seven: It's Brad Pitt.
<DestinEE> /kick #aol-sucks AOL Would that it were that easy.
<DestinEE> AOL came up with the original idea for "The A-Team"
<RichNJ> AOL dumped Hostletler and Sims, the signed Dave Brown with the NY Giants
<Gwnzrf> AOL made the Dodgers trade Offerman
<AOL> Spam spam spam spam spam spam spam!
<DestinEE> AOL stole my youth.
<Luke> I will use the force against AOL!
<AOL> I love spam!
<RichNJ> AOL stole my monkey glove
<Malice> AOL stole my 12 Monkey gloves.
* kail IS AWAY (Going to read a.a-s until y'all get this out of your systems :))
<RichNJ> AOL made me get arrested in Myrtle Beach.
<geck-o> AOL made me quit this.
<Malice> AOL told your mother for me to keep changing her lipstick color because I'm getting a rainbow around my dick.
<DestinEE> AOL fixed Hugh Grant up with his last date....
<RichNJ> AOL caused the "Blizzard of 96"
<DestinEE> AOL stole the 'Y' at the end of my nick.
* geck-o falls over.
Gwnzrf is now known as tjame-s
<DestinEE> AOL caused geck-o to fall over.
<Joe-> AOL caused the budget crisis
<RichNJ> AOL stole my lunch money.
<Joe-> AOL caused the OJ trial
* geck-o started a trend.
<AOL> AOL murdered Nicole.
<Joe-> AOL is the bully that won't stop beating me up
<Malice> AOL is a mob informant.
tjame-s is now known as WAOL
<Destin-E> AOL framed Roger Rabbit.
<Joe-> AOL is killling the spotted owl
<Destin-E> AOL talks loudly in restaurants.
<RichNJ> AOL ate Gilbert Grape.
Destin-E is now known as WAOL_EXE
<WAOL_EXE> AOL shot Laura Paulmer
<Malice> AOL is destroying the rain forest. (Where do you think they get the ma terial for all those disks they send out?)
<WAOL> General Protection Fault - click "continue" to continue
<WAOL_EXE> AOL is killing the great chefs of Europe.
<WAOL_EXE> AOL hates Greenpeace.
<WAOL_EXE> AOL carbombed two members of Earth First, and is trying to cover it up.
<DanBonadu> AOL is happening in a far-out kind of way.

It kind of peters out from there.

Categories - Funny Lists :: Internet