Strippers Exposed

by Katy Dougherty
From http://www.degroomd.com/

It's Tuesday. Traffic is jammed on Pico Boulevard. And there's a four-story high lady in front of me with a bossom the size of a small farming village. The Godzilla-sized silicone muse towers above a strip bar on the corner, pleading in the most mammary way for our patronage. But save myself, no one is looking!

What is the world coming to when gargantuan hooters can't turn a head? Are the pressures of modern society simply desensitizing us? Or are people finally losing interest in the sordid world of strip bars and their products? Can the adult fantasy culture have practical value for marriages? I needed to find out. So with the quiet pride of one who is missing not more than 7 natural born teeth, I entered "Beavers," the dark world of seedy mystery and nude intrigue.

Obviously I felt a bit nervous, uneasy about entering a strip bar packed with women who spend more each year on silicone than I spend on Dolly Madison products. What I discovered that afternoon was that strippers are just like you and me, except without the beard. In fact, they shouldn't be called strippers. They should be called just what they are: girls with really giant hooters who wish they were doing something else. It's not that they hate to strip. It's just that they have dreams and goals beyond what they're doing to pay the rent, cover tuition, keep food in their kid's belly, etc.

Yet here's where they differ...

It is tough for a stripper to keep a normal relationship on track, if they're lucky enough to find one. The average man wouldn't be happy just to date Bonnie Feuerstein, a.k.a. Bunny Boner. He would tell others that he is dating "a stripper." He would expect Bunny to maintain the facade while off duty. He would expect Bunny to clean out the cat-box in stiletto heels. In other words, he would expect a miracle. Those of us lucky enough to date an accountant or massage therapist know it takes more than a few dates at Bob's Big Boy to see an amazing tax return or enjoy hourly Shiatsu polarity treatments. What should then be different about Bunny's job and our off-duty expectations? Nothing.

"I would almost rather never tell a guy what I do for a living because then I become a trophy ... he's not serious after that. It's almost like people don't pay attention to what I'm saying," said Mandy, a stripper from Crazy Girls who looked like she could nurse the entire state of Texas. Each girl had the same complaint: that men allow the fantasy work to eclipse the "dynamic" individual, resulting in a barrier to intimacy.

Additionally, the culturally ingrained and oppressive belief that women feel competitive and threatened by one another is simply not true in this arena. On the contrary, strippers regard other women [patrons or dancers] as a welcome distraction - even a source of relief. They are empathetic toward one another, and toward crazy, fat, bald women like me.

Unfortunately, the wives at home aren't quite as empathetic. They buy into the fantasy and use it to avoid dealing with the bigger issue - TRUST! If a woman is uncomfortable with her husband being in a den of sin, she might do well to examine why. "I hate it when Mark goes to strip clubs. What is he looking for that he doesn't get at home?", asked Linda, a recent newly wed. Her complaint is a common one, but in fact probably not worth the effort. Were she to accompany him, she would see that his odds of winning the Jersey State Lottery are far better than his odds of getting to first base with a stripper. Don't forget the entire production is about as real as an adult film. It's pure entertainment, and to expect more is to do both you and the stripper a tremendous disservice. If Mark understands this, Linda has nothing to worry about. If Linda doesn't believe this, then there's a problem. Linda's best bet is to go with him and find out.

Again, much like an adult movie, this 3-D fantasy doesn't really exist. The Redhead in the g-string isn't really there. It is a persona the girl behind it has crafted, usually at great expense emotionally and financially. It is to be appreciated and enjoyed, but never coveted. It is a tremendous disservice to expect her to personify the fantasy beyond her 10 minutes on stage, in fact it would be impossible. Sex industry gals deserve the same respect you get, which is to be regarded as individuals defined by more than a 9-5. Do you want to be known simply by what you do? No. And recognizing that what they do is a service allows us to appreciate the wares without buying the cutlery.

Dr. Ava Cadell, who looks more like a stripper than most strippers, attends clubs regularly with her husband in order to "celebrate the human form and the freedom of sensual expression [nude dancing] allows." Like any other form of erotic entertainment, Dr. Cadell believes strip bars can enhance intimacy by allowing the couple to engage in a type of voyeurism that is legal and safe.

Another common mistake is the assumption that a husband or a significant other would frequent a place like "Beavers" to gawk at beautiful women. I was shocked to find the lady's who received most of the tips were in a word[s]: FAT and FLAT. One lovely lass had the dimensions of a Sumoan and the men went nuts. She was fun, smiled and laughed. What the men were attracted to was the attitude of freedom, and comfort with one's body, no matter what the shape.

Frankly, even I was attracted to it. Not in the clam-bake, carpet rubbing, scissor-kick way. But she inspired me to be more comfortable in my own skin. That night I emerged with the confidence normally inspired by a six pack of Meisterbrau. All because I learned that strip bars are not about classic beauty. Sure, there are hot mamas, but that's not the draw.

Which brings us to the point of this whole article. If strip bars can enhance a woman's confidence, inspiring her and her lover to experience a variety of sexual expressions, then they do serve a function, and in fact couples can benefit. Shocking but true.

In my estimation, visiting a strip bar can be useful to a woman's sense of self-worth and expression. As far as couples, basically the couple that uses any other form of adult entertainment can benefit similarly from the experience of a strip bar. After all, it's fun. If nothing else, you may learn some hot new moves. But I don't recommend bolting in a steel pole in the middle of your master bedroom.